Friday, September 14, 2007

Terry Ryan Resigns (that's resigning as in leaving, not resigning as in re-signing)

To start, I want to apologize to those of you looking for incredible twin porn, but this site is actually MUCH better than that. Continue reading to find out just how good it is.

The Twins had the day off today, but that does not mean there was no news. Terry Ryan, the Twins General Manager, resigned today, and Bill Smith will take over as the acting General Manager, not to be confused with Willy Wah, the acting attorney general. Smith has been with the organization for over three decades at this point, so it's not likely that there will be a large change in the style or direction of the organization. However, we will still be watching with intrigue for any moves or any hints that Smith is straying out of Terry Ryan's footsteps. As a footnote, Ryan will stay on as a special counselor. Attempts to reach Ryan for comment were unsuccessful, mainly because we didn't have access to a Minnesota phonebook.

So I leave you with that. Tomorrow Matt Garza (3-5, 3.71) will take the mound against Nate Robertson (7-11, 5.01) and the Detroit Tigers. On paper, this looks like a good matchup for the Twins, and it is, because Nate Robertson sucks! No, I didn't look at his periphials, or his VORP, or his Win Shares. But I did look at HIM- and he wears glasses! There's no way he can be even halfway decent. So good luck, and for god's sake, Justin, hit a home run!

P.S.: Dick and Bert: you suck at calling things. Next time you do, I'm starting a facebook group about it leading you down the road to unfathomable humiliation.

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